Letter #36 (page 149-152)
24 September 1949
Eighth Month, Third Day
Year of the Ox
In this letter, the main topic of discussion is Suang U’s reaction and point of view towards Weng Khim’s behavior of constantly speaking Thai to people around him. Suang U disapproves of this, for he has a great pride of being Chinese. Little Weng Khim, who was still naive and unaware of racial issues like this replied his father with innocent remarks and questions. Another issue portrayed here is about the Suang U’s Chinese way of educating children, shown in Suang U’s and Ang Buai’s discussion, where each one of them carried different perspectives and opinions.
Being a Chinese and acting like a Chinese is considered as one of the most essential aspect by Suang U. His great sense of patriotism is greatly shown in the book, even in many of the letters. In this letter he mentioned “But the origin of his family, his sae, all the past which produced him and made him who he is, these are the most important facts in his life…I want him to be able to move easily in both worlds, Thai and Chinese, but as a Chinese. When we conduct ourselves with pride and seek to benefit our adopted country by the honest work of our lives, no man will despise us.”(Page 150). This quote shows that Suang U is extremely proud about being Chinese and by being good to local Thai people in the country, he shows no fear of being hated as long as what they do is what’s morally right to do. Suang U does not want to distort his identity as a Chinese, with another reason that he is much discontented of Thais who he stereotypes as “lazy” and farangs who he consider impolite and “shameless”.
Suang U also very much values and applies the ways of traditional Chinese education to his household, especially to his only son who he expects the most from. Ang Buai’s protestation to him about his hard and “rigid” ways of educating Weng Khim which were just too much was thought of as too lenient compared to Chinese principles of life and work. Suang U says, “He will be a disciplined human being, a person who knows how to use time. He is learning that work is noble, not just an irksome necessity.” (Page 151) and “I suppose you think I ought to raise him as a Thai, eh? Let him run through the streets half-naked like those urchins outside? Never! I suppose you’d like to see him dirty and wild, ‘enjoying himself’ and dependent on his parents until he’s a parent himself—no respect, no fear, no sense! The love of a father is more than indulgence and sentimentality.” (Page 151). These words of Suang U, which were spoken a little bit harshly, demands Ang Buai to realize about how Chinese people value work, again whilst comparing their culture with Thai’s. Ang Buai is now a changed woman, she has adapted modern principles in her life. In this letter, Suang U responds to Ang Buai’s idea too hastily and extreme. Actually, Ang Buai means not to spoil Weng Khim by letting him play longer and longer. In her pint of view, forcing small children to work too much is a dangerous thing to do, that can also affect his behavior in the future. But in the traditional Chinese culture, in fact, until now, Chinese parents teach their children to be hard-workers, to appreciate the value of precious time, money and hardship.
Suang U, however, has good and kind intentions towards Weng Khim. This can be concluded from the last sentence of the quote above. He feels that treating children like “spoiled brats” is an unrighteous thing to do. A child cannot depend on his/her parents forever and for a parent like Suang U, seeing his own grown-up son incapable in his life in the future will be a disappointing thing to see, which shows his failure for giving his love to Weng Khim in a wrong way, in a way that does not prepare him for the cruel reality his son has to face in the future.
Letter #86 (page 360-367)
30 January 1966
First Month, Tenth Day
Year of the Horse
This letter is written by Suang U sometime after all of his children but Meng Chu have gotten married. In this letter, Suang U writes about his conversation with Winyu, a Thai schoolteacher soon to be married to Meng Chu, Suang U’s youngest child and with Ang Buai, still about the matter of choosing the race of the husband for one of his daughters. Again in this letter, just like previously before, Suang U tries to convince himself about the truth of his stereotype about Chinese, Thai and farangs.
Apparently, now, 50 letters after letter #35, Suang U is feeling disappointed about his children. Weng Khim, from whom he expects the most has disgraced his family and according to Weng Khim himself, it is because “It was the only time in my life I ever got what I wanted the way I wanted and on my terms.” (Page 338). Chui Kim, who is married to a rich Chinese man does not really care about him anymore and Bak Li, too, has brought disgrace and the situation forced her to marry an incompetent Chinese man. He wonders whether there is something wrong with his method of educating or not.
At the beginning paragraphs of his letter, he mentioned “There is one person who does try to understand why I write these letters, and oddly enough it is Winyu the schoolteacher, who hopes to marry my Meng Chu.” (Page 361). There is a sense of queerness in his tone when he says this and it is because Suang U never expects that a Thai man will say something wise like this, not a Thai man of his stereotype about them. Winyu is an open-minded man, who never hesitates to “borrow an idea” if it is good. Later on, Winyu’s confesses about his thoughts about Chinese and how he wants to avoid getting along with a Chinese father in-law after he’s married. He mentions “The things you believe about Thai men are as unfair as the old saw that all Chinese are greedy chiselers.” (Page 362) and “What I do not like is the fact that you came to my country and got rich in my country, and now you sit there and tell me I can’t marry your daughter…Your attitude toward your place in our society I frankly detest.” In other words, Winyu expects Suang U to open his mind and erase his stereotype about Thai men and to receive more of other people’s ideas. Later, hoping that his sister in-law would understand him, he tells Ang Buai that he thinks Meng Chu rather marries a Chinese ice cream vendor than an intelligent Thai schoolteacher. This time, just like Ang Buai before, she is in Meng Chu and Winyu’s side, making Suang U feel “humiliated and lonely”.
This plot change, beginning from the fate of marriage of three of his children and ending at his discussion with Winyu in this letter is meant to “confront” Suang U’s feeling of being superior and to point out his wrong perceptions. Winyu is used to modify the character of Suang U to lead the story to the point that Suang U realizes his mistake and starting to become more humble and feeling less superior and racist. This is a change for the better and it signifies another learning point of Suang U. Although at the end of the letter Suang U is still stubborn, in the next letters, Suang U starts to think about this and thanks to the further plot that shows that among his children, Meng Chu and his husband cares for him the most, he, at last changes.
